The best way to know the self is feeling oneself at the moments of reckoning. The feeling of being alone, just with your senses, may lead you to think more consciously. More and more of such moments may sensitize ‘you towards you’, towards others. We become regular with introspection and retrospection. We get ‘the’ gradual connect to the higher self we may name Spirituality or God or just a Humane Conscious. We tend to get a rhythm again in life. We need to learn the art of being lonely in crowd while being part of the crowd. A multitude of loneliness in mosaic of relations! One needs to feel it severally, with conscience, before making it a way of life. One needs to live several such lonely moments. One needs to live severallyalone.

Saturday 30 May 2015


Still living that day
Like yesterday
When I had decided
To sit, to think 
To go deeper inside
To make a life 
As I had thought  
To see the way ahead 

It is my decision
To remain unsettled 
And to live the feeling
Of the day 
As it was just yesterday
The day when I felt 
I was crying for an edifice
That never cared for me 

I needed to look back 
Into the time and its reasons 
To try again to find 
Why it was all so ambiguous 
I would ask for answers
But why there were none 
Yes, I still don’t have answers 
But I accepted it on that day

What I did in my past
Was about my decisions 
And I needed to go along
To find the reasons 
For my decisions ahead
To set my soul free 
To come out of ghettos 
That had cropped up 

The day when I realized 
My life was still mine 
Even if some decisions 
Were not in time 
When I felt
Even if I was wronged 
I could reconcile 
With what was dark 

The decision
That gave me life back 
The way I was
It asked to look back at 
The days in past 
Even if the darker ones
With reasons never given 
To find the light ahead 

I still live that day
To own my decisions 
Taking what all I say 
To reason further 
To settle 
On an unsettling path 
To see the way ahead 

©/IPR: Santosh Chaubey -