It’s better to look inside than to run aimlessly when pain
afflicts you. Handling it positively is the reminder that you are still in the
league of independent souls, and have not become the mere pawns of fate,
destiny or compromised existence.
Like most of the emotions in life, pain, too, is a
feeling, relative in its impact (except in cases of death, where it is
absolute, beyond control, beyond counseling).
This relativity is directed to and directed by the ‘inner
us’, that leads us to develop the way we communicate with the life.
The ‘inner us’ is guided by the way we look at life and
it, in turn, helps us to create and follow a trajectory.
Most of the things in life are interrelated and so are the
emotions. Most of the events that look and feel standalone could lead to
something and could have resulted out of something. Yes, there are exceptions.
But exceptions are not the rule. Isn’t it?
As a natural corollary, we develop a mental faculty that
explores (desirably or undesirably) links to the events happening in our lives.
If it is positive, it adds positively. But if the self-initiated
sensory process of visiting and revising the past or the probabilities comes
out to be negative, it makes living miserable. It adds to the gloom. It
compounds the pain. It creates pain where pain had not to be. It adulterates
feelings.
Once its starts happening, it creates a chain of similar
feelings overtaking the person. And it leads to escapism where one runs away
from the pain, compromising the independence that one had, killing the identity
one wanted to be, overriding the ‘person’ one needed to be. The person becomes
prisoner of the pain when he needed to master it. Pain suppresses his learning
when he has to learn from it to handle it effectively the next time anything
similar happens.
So, the interrelation involves risk. And if it involves
‘past or probabilities’ associated with painful memories or pain-evoking
prospects, the risk level magnifies significantly.
If living is also about learning to handle and mitigate
the elements of risk, one needs to learn and master the ‘dependence of these
interrelations’. Pain is not good. But it is not always monstrous, as an
escapist mind traces it.
One needs to learn how to segregate the interrelations;
how and when to look at the interrelated moments and events as their standalone
counterparts.
If one learns this basic tenet that governs the
‘relativity of emotions’, he can kill or can effectively deal with the pain
learning and growing from it. And for this, one needs to go inside, to talk to
the ‘inner him’.