The best way to know the self is feeling oneself at the moments of reckoning. The feeling of being alone, just with your senses, may lead you to think more consciously. More and more of such moments may sensitize ‘you towards you’, towards others. We become regular with introspection and retrospection. We get ‘the’ gradual connect to the higher self we may name Spirituality or God or just a Humane Conscious. We tend to get a rhythm again in life. We need to learn the art of being lonely in crowd while being part of the crowd. A multitude of loneliness in mosaic of relations! One needs to feel it severally, with conscience, before making it a way of life. One needs to live several such lonely moments. One needs to live severallyalone.

Thursday, 28 January 2010

LIFE, HERE YOU ARE

We feel life moves on. We are made to feel life moves on. If we do not feel it is moving on, we compel us to think it moves on. But do we know what do we mean when we say ‘life moves on’? Are we aware of the orientation; of the direction that every passing moment, pushes us to.

The moments have a timeline. Their chronology gets updated and mind you that is the only consistent development that can happen to anyone, at least on the living geographical mass of this Earth. But is life just a collection of moments? For me that is not. A life is driven by certain core values, some inseparable voices, and interweaved, intrinsic memories. We go on adding to what we have. We go on editing what we have. Many of us are efficient editors. Some are rarely poor in this talent. Thankfully I inhabit the later fulcrum. The moments move on, characterized by memories or events, or just as plain physical entities. There may or may not be life in these passing moments. We may or may not pick the beads here and there. Our life may not ‘move on’ or may retrograde based on the moments that we choose to ponder on. The accumulation may be considerable in terms of effects and tenacity that for a long time, we remain there, from the moment we last picked up, taking nothing from those coming and going later on. So the moments move on. But the life doesn’t. But we live the ‘life’ in those static moments. Many of us pick the beads consistently to preserve the thread, playing it safe. Do they live their life or just pass it?

We are closest to us when we feel lost and alone, aligning us to the intertwined memories. When should we feel we are moving on or when should we feel we better be static? At times, when we felt the life moved on, we came to know, suddenly, at a passing fine moment that everything moved back. Most of the time we feel otherwise. But all this is truly enigmatic. Moving in the name of movement. Moving for the sake of abandonment. Moving with the wheels of anomalies. Moving away of the spokes of harmonies. Moving to be part of the pragmatic mass. Moving to be a loner. Moving to be a survivor. Moving to be a crusader. Moving for the cause of finding you. Moving in the name of forgetting you. Moving in the name of proving you. Moving in the name on obliterating you. Moving in the name of ‘life moves on’.

There are some lives that remain static in terms of passing of moments, for, they are left somewhere by the life forces, that had started defining their moments, deeming them unfit projections. They do not find newer horizons; they do not want to. Instead, they have the rarest of the opportunity, to find the inner horizons that have gradually receded to the last in the value scale. Many of us move on, find new horizons, and define us in a different way, making happy endings of the moments, irrespective of whether there was life in all of those passing moments. But that is also a way of life, in fact, the largely accepted one. But the debate arises. Who lives the moments fully?

Probably one who doesn’t go to justify it? Sifting the moments that define your core values and the inseparable memories, remaining there, static, to maintain the harmony with your inner-self, defines the constant you.

When do we feel at one with us? These are the moments, when we can fix the different pallets of our existence into one uniform identity that we first aspired to have, crude, bare, and certainly the purest one. Their lives are said to be static but they get what they are looking for. They grow up with their values. They get the opportunity to refine what was crude once. They may or may not succeed, but they live the process. They live their life to define them, certainly a battle of the life time.

They grow up remaining the same. Life is just not about moving on. It is about identifying and building on those moments that define you. It is about being static with those moments and growing up with your crude values and interspersed memories, always on a path of refinement. It is always there. You need to see it. Here it comes.